Plaintiff: Canada vs. Defendants: Justin and Evan with Accomplice: Margaritaville
The following charges have been cited against the Defendants by the Canadian states of Alberta and British Columbia. The Defendants pleaded no contest, while the Accomplice has yet to enter a plea.
• 1 count of smuggling: When passing the Canadian border, Defendants were instructed by the border patrol to discard all pitted fruits brought in from the US. Defendants threw away 2 rotten plums but proceeded through the border with a box of California dates – all 50 pitted fruits.
• 5 counts of illegal overnight parking: Defendants spent 3 nights in Banff and 2 nights in Jasper parking overnight on the streets instead of paying for a campground site. They claimed all nearby sites were full and had no choice but to spend the night in their RV on the street.
• 1 count of poaching: Defendants caught a boat ride while returning from a hike but did not pay for the ride which costs $5.50 per person. Their only response was, "Who hikes with their wallet?"
• 3 counts of theft: 1) In the town of Jasper, Defendants stole Internet at Lou Lou’s Pizzeria because there was no log-in required rather than paying $2 for 20 minutes. They were frequently seen sitting on the bench next to Lou Lou’s tapping away on their iPhone and using Skype to call home. 2) Then at the Columbia Icefield Visitor Center cafeteria, Defendants pilfered packets of ketchup without buying food there. 3) At Honeymoon Lake Campground, Defendants stole two boxes of chopped wood to use at another campsite. Even though the wood was free, they are intended for those camping at Honeymoon Lake.
The court finds the Defendants Justin and Evan GUILTY of all charges. The Defendants have been sentenced to a lifetime ban from Canada plus 30 years at a maximum security prison and a $1 million fee. The Accomplice Margaritaville will be locked up in a car compound for 10 years with no parole.
Defendants have fled with the Accomplice and were last seen in the town of Banff picking up two additional accomplices, Brian and Becca, who arrived from the US this afternoon. They are expected to continue their life of petty crime until they are caught again.
3 comments:
what is the reward if I bring the culprits in?
That's it, Matt can't hang out with you, Justin or Margaritaville. He is so impressionable and I know I will lose him to your wayward ways.
What's the Bounty $ reward?
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